Post by Peter Gibbons on May 1, 2014 1:57:54 GMT -8
Agriculture - The downfall of human civilization. Had we continued to evolve into hunters and gathers we would not be dealing with the population crisis we currently face today. Survival of the fittest is a phrase that is loosely thrown around to differentiate pro athletes and scholars from the common intellectual and physical rejects. Darwin awards are handed out to those few who have embarrassed themselves enough to become a relevant topic of conversation. Instead of relying on our physical/mental abilities to survive we question whether eating meat is moral. We have evolved into a species that believes we are superior to the laws of nature.
Humans, in their primal state were reliant on strength and cunning to provide food and shelter for their families. Our biggest problem nowadays are where to eat lunch and whether we have enough money for tickets to the next show. The need to provide for yourself and others has been replaced with a resentment for property taxes and the price of gasoline.
Agriculture has provided salmonella soaked breakfast burritos and theoretical steak nachos. Agriculture has also skewed thoughts of desirable mating attributes. Being shirtless and listening to Kids on repeat is more important than hunting ability. Getting stuck in a tree on acid while being dressed like a giraffe makes you interesting. Carrying a Canadian flag makes you exotic.
I pose to you two similar situations.
Someone at Sasquatch asks you for a cigarette and you've got one almost empty pack and two full packs. You can choose to pull out the almost empty pack and say that you only have 2 left and that you can't spare a square, or you can be generous and give them one; knowing that you have 40 in reserve. You don't think of cancer or litter, the decision is based on how charitable and how fucked up you are. Who cares that the cigarette butt is dropped on the ground for Switch and J. Walter Weatherman to pick up while recycling glow sticks?
Someone at Sasquatch asks you for a piece of gum. You would understand that the requesting individual is simply trying to enhance his/her copulation ability since fresh breath is more important than the ability to cook a hot dog. You've got one almost empty pack and two full packs. You can choose to pull out the almost empty pack and say that you only have 2 left, or you can be generous and give them one; knowing that you have 40 in reserve. You don't think of cancer and litter because this is gum.
Three hours later some asshole decides to sit on the fucking ground to hang out with some fucking internet friends. "What's that you say, I can't hear you, let me lean over and place my fucking elbow into the exact place that some fucking douchebag spit out his gum."
TL;DR - I just spent 30 minutes removing gum from the elbow of my favorite sweatshirt. I had to smell the 10 month old spearmint the entire time. If given a choice, give people cancer, not gum.
Post by Peter Gibbons on Mar 31, 2014 8:49:47 GMT -8
Well, looks like I'm fucked. I was rooting for the #6 seed to win in the first round so I would get an easier matchup in the second round. You would think that the #1 seed would play the #6 seed in the second round. Instead I get to play one of the only teams that I haven't beaten all year, and the commish gets to play the lowest seeded team. Hmmmm.
EDIT: Shit, and one of my best players just got hurt.
EDIT EDIT: ...And he is still on the can't cut list.
I think if I was a girl dating a bisexual guy (which is the oposite of what I am) I would prefer you be the bottom.
What is the opposite here? You must be a boy just friends with an asexual gal. Or is it a woman married to a trisexual man?
I actually figured Daver was a guy dating a bisexual girl; which in the context of the discussion would create a proper frame of reference for stating that he would prefer his bisexual girlfriend to be the bottom.
Post by Peter Gibbons on Mar 19, 2014 10:33:05 GMT -8
Well, if no one signs up before the real games start tomorrow morning then it looks like it'll be me and Mrs. Gibbons vs mutt.
Just to make things interesting I made a second bracket that consists of only favorites winning. This would represent the douche bracket and I would hope that that bracket would finish in last place. More than likely it will end up on top.
I created the group on ESPN.com. It's called Sasquatch Board Challenge. The password is: sasquatch. You can search for it and join, or you can post or send me your email address and I can add you. Limit two brackets.
Group is still active if you want to join again. I think we should keep it to one bracket per person though.
I voted to change the draft time to Thursday, March 20 at 10 pm ET. The first game is at 4 am ET Saturday, March 22.
The first two games will count regardless of when we draft. I've done drafts before the bonus games and after, and have no preference either way. It's definitely tougher drafting a week earlier and not knowing who will win position battles.
We currently have 5 out of 6 votes to change the draft time. My father-in-law who tied me for 3rd place last year will be out of town and unable to draft on the 27th. If the 20th doesn't present a conflict for any of you, could we get someone to cast the last vote? I would prefer to prevent him from using auto-draft as an excuse for me beating him this year. In actuality, I'm more scared that his auto-drafted team will be better than if he drafted it.
Additional question: Are we required to drink from da victory bag once-a we slappa?
I am likely going to have to pass my bagga slappa privileges onto a worthy friend (whom I wish so badly to be Lumpy) when I inevitably win this contest with my Kraftwerk points (fucka da you, nick), but don't think I won't be cashing in hard on that fistpoop.
Dammit, none of you heathens knew the full glory of Kraftwerk before I showed up!
Name: Jason What my user name represents/means: I like to eat burritos. From: Shoreline, WA Favorite Bands: Black Dice, Animal Collective, Melt-banana, Boredoms, Fugazi, Sigur Ros, Deerhunter, Radiohead, Tool, all bands associated with Maestro Zach Hill, Tortoise, Godspeed You! Black Emperor, Explosions in the Sky, Lightning Bolt, Excepter, Circle, Caribou, Built to Spill, Battles, Kraftwerk, Deerhoof
You were wasted, and you really like Alt-J. Two things are "amazing" about Alt-J, how boring they are live, and how their fans don't seem to care.
Don't worry buddy, it happens to all of us. We go see a lackluster performance by a band we are obsessed with, we get really drunk/high, and it's the best thing ever. Don't apologize for it, but don't try to convince the internet it's great.
Do you even know how to read or are you completely retarded?