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Post by Lump on Jun 5, 2012 11:05:11 GMT -8
No change. NO CHANGE!!!!
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Post by Fig on Jun 5, 2012 11:25:14 GMT -8
I suppose it is time for me to recount some of my favorite stories from Sasquatch now that I have my office set up.
1) A Man and His Teddy Bear
So one night Lucy and I get back from the venue to our camp site and see a few of our camp mates sitting around in silence, exhausted from the day. I noticed one person who I had never seen before who was wearing sunglasses and his head was bobbing around like some Weekend at FD's house shit but thought nothing of it. We go to wander around and eventually return to the camp later in the night.
Upon returning, one of our camp mates goes to hit the sack in her tent only to come bounding out exclaiming that a stranger is in her tent. It is the random guy from earlier who we promptly escort out of the tent, ignoring his protests of "but I left my backpack, $800, and Teddy here!" as we ushered him away from our camp. He returned as we were still partying and the sun was coming up, much more sober than before and actually appeared to be a cool guy. He had no fucking clue where his tent was so once Lucy finally passed out, I grabbed some wizard sticks and lead my wizard apprentices on a march to find his tent and his god damn Teddy that he would not stop talking about (Gibbons and Know saw me leading this march at one point).
When we finally got to his tent, all of his stuff was there. All of it. Including a giant, 4' tall Teddy Bear. Now, we all got a kick out of this because why the fuck would he have that at Sasquatch with him. What an odd and funny thing to do, right? Well he didn't stop there; in fact, he pulled up a chair for the bear to sit in around his table with all of us (the one wizard's apprentice who had been giving us weed to smoke was forced to sit on the ground so Teddy could have a seat) at which point the dude fucking kneels in front of the bear and starts talking to it. At first I thought, "OK, well I guess this is still funny. This guy really wants to milk this joke" but as he continued, saying things like "I told you not to wander away from me!" and "I'm just so happy you're safe" for TWO FUCKING MINUTES. All of my apprentices and I began getting uncomfortable, only to witness him actually kiss the bear on the end of the snout. Dragon sugar had nothing to do with this, mind you...I think we simply had met the next Dahlmer.
More stories to come!
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Post by StormyPinkness on Jun 5, 2012 11:26:19 GMT -8
This is so true. When we used to walk around and trip a lot we would have our 'juice tickets' with us, which meant some cash so we didn't have to worry about paying with a card or anything when we wanted some juice or crackers or whatever.
"I know that magazine"
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Post by unifiedscene on Jun 5, 2012 11:31:37 GMT -8
Crazy! I saw that guy walking around the campground with that giant bear. Didn't notice if he was talking to it.
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Post by Fig on Jun 5, 2012 11:32:38 GMT -8
2) "Where the Fuck Am I?"Prior to meeting the Teddy Bear guy, Lucy and I were rampaging through the camp ground on the Party Train (or Party Bus, as Lucy likes to call it for no good reason) when I met JJ: After taking a few pulls off of his bottle of cheap wine, we parted ways. The next morning, after putting Dahlmer to sleep, my apprentices and I continued our march through the camp ground. One of them suggested we head over towards the perimeter area near the trees (close to Camp HG) to find his friend. We approach a minivan, which I guess belonged to his friend, and he starts peering in it to try and wake up whoever is in the seat. That is when I noticed that the entire side of the van had been smashed by a car. It was bad. Not only that, but the windshield was destroyed. It looked like somebody had headbutted it (ala re:GEN acid guy) or hit it with a bat. The car was fucked and we started feeling uncomfortable about it so I turn to lead us away when suddenly I saw something move on top of the van. It was that guy, JJ. Still in his robe. Groaning like a dying giraffe. I gave him a hi-five and we were once more on our way.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Jun 5, 2012 11:34:40 GMT -8
That picture is the best thing I've ever seen.
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Post by Fig on Jun 5, 2012 11:35:48 GMT -8
JJ IS WATCHING YOU POOP.
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Post by Friendly Destroyer on Jun 5, 2012 11:35:52 GMT -8
Awwww, JJ looked so on-top-of-the-world too!
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Post by StormyPinkness on Jun 5, 2012 11:35:53 GMT -8
JJ looks like he has been partying his whole life.
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Post by Drew on Jun 5, 2012 11:42:05 GMT -8
I love these stories with no clear conclusions. This is like watching a Japanese drama.
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Post by themermaid- on Jun 5, 2012 20:45:38 GMT -8
Yay I have internet again! All I can think of right now is: I bought a poster and Felix Cartal tshirt from merch on the last day. Came to $40. Handed the woman a $50. She gives me $15 back. SCORE!
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Post by themermaid- on Jun 5, 2012 20:58:10 GMT -8
A friend was really drunk before Beirut started, and we were trying to get into the inner pit. Well he decided to "look for his mom up front" and started yelling "MY MOM SHE'S UP THERE SHE'S SCARED I NEED TO GET HER MY MOM MY MOM I NEED TO GO UP FRONT MY MOM!" When nobody would let him past, he started playing rock paper scissors with everyone to trade spots with them!
We finally got into the inner pit and there he goes again with the "mom" thing. This time people are just lettin' him go because he's so drunk. As he got closer to the front, every 5 feet we would see a group of heads turn, and what looked like another rock paper scissors game, and on he would go.
Eventually someone pointed him out to security and he got lifted out. Buuuut not before he played rock paper scissors with security first, and lost.
I didn't see him at the festival after that happened
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Post by Drew on Jun 5, 2012 20:58:56 GMT -8
That is a good story.
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Post by themermaid- on Jun 5, 2012 21:46:20 GMT -8
Some douchebag from Washington told us to take the I-5 all the way to Sasquatch, and then when we got separated from our friends with the GPS we thought "oh okay that guy said this will work so lets do this"
Yeah.
WE DROVE ALL THE WAY TO TACOMA! And I accidentally stole maps from a convenient store because I legit thought they were free (they were $8 each. I stole two.) Fuck it though, got us to the Safeway in Ellensburg where we met up with the rest of our festival gang.
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Post by Goldbart der Hexenmeister on Jun 5, 2012 22:34:45 GMT -8
I'm sure a good portion of the employees are placed there by temp agencies. Not to disparage anyone that ever has/had to go that route, but you know what you're going to get with some of those people. They look like the walking dead from time to time. When I was wandering back to my tent at 4:30 a bunch of them yelled at me and some people for climbing the fence. Then some guy started yelling in a way where he was openly mocking how they yelled at me. So then the guy and I started fake yelling at each other. Soon they're swarming and launch a full chase of the yelling dude.
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Post by Goldbart der Hexenmeister on Jun 5, 2012 22:37:02 GMT -8
Some douchebag from Washington told us to take the I-5 all the way to Sasquatch, and then when we got separated from our friends with the GPS we thought "oh okay that guy said this will work so lets do this" Yeah. WE DROVE ALL THE WAY TO TACOMA! And I accidentally stole maps from a convenient store because I legit thought they were free (they were $8 each. I stole two.) Fuck it though, got us to the Safeway in Ellensburg where we met up with the rest of our festival gang. To be fair, we use this trick to defend our homeland against the all too trusting annual Canadian Invasion. Someday you guys might want to try and take Washington back.
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Post by Pea on Jun 5, 2012 22:43:26 GMT -8
Cascadia!
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Post by davers on Jun 5, 2012 23:02:11 GMT -8
I'm sure a good portion of the employees are placed there by temp agencies. Not to disparage anyone that ever has/had to go that route, but you know what you're going to get with some of those people. They look like the walking dead from time to time. Some of them pretty much are. Last year we partied with this guy until 630am. He was still sorta high on acid and doing the odd poop off of his key. He looked at his watch a bit before 7 and said "Shit, I gotta go to work in 30 minutes!" He was a drink seller. We found him that day and he gave us free beer.
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Post by Friendly Destroyer on Jun 6, 2012 5:48:41 GMT -8
That guy was most definitely incorrect change maker offender number 1 that day.
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Post by Friendly Destroyer on Jun 6, 2012 5:49:25 GMT -8
Hope JJ joins the board. Just a personal thought.
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